Downside of a Semi-Public Life

No good deed goes unpunished.

I got my punishment Thursday (last night).  I’m still having problems processing this in a way.  It was… surreal.   Though, it did confirm my choice to keep referring to my kids by their nicknames and avoid showing their faces on my public identities.

I should stop being vague and properly explain.

Thursday night, I got a new blog comment (which I will not approve) from a tween who was very unhappy with me. (<- the punishment)  About my writing?  I mean this blog is about writing, so it had to be about that, right? Nope.

Oh, that’s right… I talk about my life, like many other writers do.  I talk about going to places, cooking, pets, crafting projects, movies, and things I’m into.  So, what did I talk about to anger a tween?

My guinea pigs.

Did I make a care faux pas?  Was I hurting my guinea pigs?  Was I spreading guinea pig misinformation into the world?  Nope.  What I did was was I gave them a home.

For those that don’t know, I got my guinea pigs from another family.  It was a rehoming situation.  (<- the good deed)  Next best thing to adoption in my book.  But, this tween only saw her friend hurting because these guinea pigs (months ago) were given to me.

Thankfully, the situation was resolved in a matter of hours.  Though, the awkwardness and weirdness of it all did flair up my social anxiety…  I was literally vibrating at one point. (<- extra punishment?)  However, I got through it and everyone is happy now.

The whole thing made me think about how I have a semi-public life.  I don’t share everything, but I share quite a bit.  It made me think about my choices in what I do share.  Should I be sharing less?

Fact is, I always expected my writing life to impact something in my life.  I always thought that someone would find something I wrote offensive and come confront me public, near my home (like downtown or at my kids’ schools).  This was why I protect my kids’ identities.  Never in a hundred years did I expect my personal life to have a manifestation in my writing life like this.  In the future, will a mom angry with of my kids come to the blog to rage at me?  I didn’t imagine that until now.

Have you thought about it?
Have a story like mine?
How do you decide what to share?

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Categories: Random | Tags: , , , , , , | 7 Comments

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7 thoughts on “Downside of a Semi-Public Life

  1. As someone who has also experienced the vibration caused by intense anxiety, I feel for you. The whole concepts of blogs actually being public is one I don’t really link about either. I refer to my partner by A (he’s given me permission to do this), and I avoid specifics as well, and yet even though people all over the world read my blog (not a lot of them), it still seems quite, well, private. Lots to think about…

    • I generally refer to my husband as my husband, but sometimes I call him out by name because for a bit he was a bit of a Semi-Public person himself. He released various role playing games and well… That gig is a bit like self-pubbing.

      If I mention people, I deal with that in a variety of ways: nicknames, first initial, or status (like my father-in-law or in the above tween). However, if they are blogging and doing stuff that can use promoting, I always use their name and link to them. Because, that just seems the way to do it…

      Now I’m all, “Should I nickname all the pets?”

      • I’m a bit the same when it comes to names. Unless the person is also a blogger, or they’ve given me permission to promote them or talk about them, I usually use initials or status like you!

  2. Like you, I don’t use photos of my children or their “real” names. It’s hard to decide what to share and what to keep private. I’m sorry that you had a hard time with something so…good. I’m sure the guinea pigs are happy, and really that’s what matters. Tweens are hormonally challenged and get upset over odd stuff.

    • I use photos of my kids but like parts (hands, arms, or such), from the back, or shadows. Once I let my kids be in one of my vlogs. I made them wear masks. I’ve been trying to be inclusive of them while protective of them. A hard balance.

      To be honest, I wasn’t mad that it happened, so much as shocked. I understand people have emotional moments and such. I just didn’t want it to escalate or, worse, become a habit for the tween in question (the actions seemed a gateway to cyberbullying, something I’m so not down with). Also it was behavior I would not approve of from my kids. So I saw the parents were informed and thankfully it was all resolved quickly.

  3. I keep my work place out of blog, Twitter, and Facebook posts. Sometimes I call the husband, Hubs or David but only because it’s easier to type those instead of his full name and he is active on the interwebs (many people are likely to have hear of him). My friends are first name only, unless promoting something. And I only post pictures of people with consent. It just seems polite and often simpler. And I don’t post things that are too personal, too much vague-booking and finger pointing. If it’s relevant or I am looking for advise on an issue, problem, or writer’s block then I divulge details.

    • I do discuss my depression, which I think might fall under too personal for some. However, I try to do it in a matter-of-fact way that is relevant to what I’m discussing. (For example, how I bombed last round because of my two pets’ death and my kids no longer believing in Santa… It was a hard Nov. & Dec.)

      I try not to vaguebook, but that can be hard when trying to shield details. And I try to keep it positive, so I avoid the finger pointing too. And I’m with you on consent in pictures. That’s why I mostly share my pets! 😉

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